🐛 Use server-side apply for e2e CreateOrUpdate

[nojnhuh]

What this PR does / why we need it:

The "get + update" sequence that CreateOrUpdate implements is too blunt when retries kick in. If a controller or webhook makes some monotonic change after an object was created by CreateOrUpdate, then blindly updating the object in a retry to match literally was initially created will fail.

e.g. Creating a template consisting of a Cluster with spec.topology will prompt the topology controller to add a controlPlaneRef and infrastructureRef. Retrying that creation prompts an update which tries to remove those fields which is invalid:

admission webhook "validation.cluster.cluster.x-k8s.io" denied the request: Cluster.cluster.x-k8s.io "capz-e2e-fxe4ui-cc" is invalid: [spec.infrastructureRef: Forbidden: cannot be removed, spec.controlPlaneRef: Forbidden: cannot be removed

Which issue(s) this PR fixes (optional, in fixes #<issue number>(, fixes #<issue_number>, ...) format, will close the issue(s) when PR gets merged):
Fixes #13264

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[nojnhuh]

/retitle 🐛 Use server-side apply for e2e CreateOrUpdate
/area e2e-testing

[nojnhuh]

/test ?

[k8s-ci-robot]

@nojnhuh: The following commands are available to trigger required jobs:

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/test pull-cluster-api-e2e-main

/test pull-cluster-api-e2e-main-gke

/test pull-cluster-api-e2e-mink8s-main

/test pull-cluster-api-e2e-upgrade-1-35-1-36-main

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[nojnhuh]

/test pull-cluster-api-e2e-upgrade-1-35-1-36-main

[sbueringer]

/hold

Let's discuss on the issue